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July 25, 2013

Day 21 - I'm a survivor

 Eating at Ramen Keisuke Tonkotsu King

Hanging out with friends after work and on weekends are the reason why my calendar is always filled up. I like social activity, especially when there are endless topics that peppered the environment with laughter and sometimes even mindless topics

Today, we gathered and something my bestie told me stir up the reflective soul in me. Ever since I started my online fashion business (De-Stylez), I have been in a pensive mode more often than usual, spacing out frequently - a trait commonly observed by my boss.

The conversation was about how we are all producers of our life, and things we do eventually becomes a reflection of an event or a series of events that happened to us in the past.

She told of this story about a woman who was the 9th child in the family. As the youngest, she rarely gets as much attention from the parents as you hope you would. She wedded and eventually an ended up with a divorce. She had to move out of her house and ended up living with her parents.

Do you see a catch here? Think deeper.

While not (yet) able to piece my own story together, I reflect and see how things are connecting.

Need for Rewards - When I was young, we were awarded with real cash money (redeemable through yearly trips to Toys'R'us) if we performed well in school. I excelled and was rewarded and this continues, in my subsequent studies - scholarship and ranking, and in my career - recognition and income. Though I am always above the average, somehow I will never get to the top. I never aim for prestigious school nor work hard to get to number 1 - this I couldn't quite figure out. Other times, I gave up too easily knowing that I will the slightest possibility of failing.


Arts & Design - While I never gotten into a designing school, I do have an eye for all things beautiful and in proportion. My brain is telling me it has got to do with a drawing of Flounder that I completed with the help of my dad. It was the most impressionable drawing, and which I was amazed with the end results and became proud of. Eventually it was pinned up onto the wall for everyone to admire.

Entrepreneurship - perhaps entrepreneurship is a reflection of wanting to be just like my dad. He used to bring us (when we were young) to his office every weekend, and I am always amazed by all the machineries inside and how it all belonged to us, at least for the weekend. I especially like to sit on his chair, swinging round and round and round. Starting my business now, I am confident yet sometimes I wonder if this is founded based on some unfounded confidence. Will I succeed? I really hope it will but at the same time, I am prepared that it may not take off.

The above may seems random, but maybe I will slowly see how things take shape when I reflect years later. If I could know my destiny, wouldn't life be so much simpler? But living in this world, we are not only alive, but we are a survivor. Believe in your capability, for you have come and survived this far.

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